I am lucky

Its been a while!

I can't believe how long its been since I have updated. I almost forgot how to log on to here! I wish I would keep up with this like I use to. I miss blogging!!

Things are so amazing in my life right now. Sure I am still battling some struggles, but I am doing it with a more positive outlook, and I think that is helping. I am less stressed and am just enjoying spending every minute with my baby...who is not much of a baby anymore. Ty is now 16 months and he's a joy. A very tiring joy! He is so energetic and is getting into everything, but hey he is a boy! We recently recieved some new diapers from some wonderful friends of ours, and are loving using them! Sunbaby diapers rock, you all need to look into them!

About a month ago, I purchased a custom mini quilt from a wonderful friend. Ty loves his quilt, and is constantly hugging it and playing with it. I cannot wait to save up and buy another one from Tracey!

Check out her quilting blog, she's an awesome momma with an amazingly handsome little boy! Traceyjay quilts

I have a few diapers to pay forward, as Ty no longer fits in them. So this week I will make a blog for it, and hopefully find someone who I can give some diapers to. Diapers include Cow Patties CD and some other WAHM dipes! I would love to pay these forward!!

Of course, something else...

Well recently we have found Ty a couple new snacks. He LOVES fruit cups, pears, oranges..peaches ect. He can't get enough of them! So we give him about two a day...since he has been very picky recently! Even Anuty Amanda has become somewhat addicted to them. We buy the ones that are in water or juice with no syrup...so we can  try and be healthy. Well guess what? A study has been done, and of course they found out that the foods we feed our children are not safe. This is even food geared towards babies, such as Gerber products. They have found an excess amount of LEAD...yes thats right, LEAD in these products. How can we feel safe as parents to feed our children anything? Or give them medicine that is supposed to help them, not harm them? The FDA really really needs to crack down on this.

Website with information on fruit

The DOWNs of motherhood

Yesterday we were all playing in the living room, Ty being his usual self and running everywhere. I was watching him and was thinking that he was going to fall and cut his head open, I could see it happen, and then I thought that I would text Michelle so she could update all my BOF mommies. Only two minutes later it happened. He was running around and fell into the corner of the wall. It was a loud thud. I sat there frozen. He started crying and I rushed to him. There was blood everywhere, on the carpet, all down him, in his eyes, mouth..everywhere. I have never in my life seen that much blood. We put a wet paper towel on it and got him in the car. I was in shock I couldn't speak, I was stuttering. I tried to say words but they wouldn't come out.

We arrived at the ER which luckily is only 5 mins down the road. Ty had calmed down and wanted to play with all the toys but I wouldn't let him since he was covered in blood. The nurse took us in and took all his vitals. He hated the different people coming in and doing stuff to him. The doctor came in (a nice pediatric doc from childrens) and took a look at him. He needed stitches. He put some numbing cream on the cut and a band aid. Came back 30 mins later do to the stitches.

X arrived. and he was so mean to me when my family was out of the room. I was already feeling like a crappy mother, but he made it worse. Saying I should have watched him more and that this could have been prevented. The nurse came in and supermanned Ty's arms in a pillow case, and then swaddled him. Thats what he hated most, being held down. The doc then did his stitches. Three of them, which wasn't too bad but I wish he hadn't of needed them.

I saw my friend Anthony at the ER, he works there and he was such a sweetheart!

I never thought my little man would ever need stitches. I never thought he would get hurt, I never thought this would happen to him. I thought he was indestructible. With a name like Tyson, he should be beating the walls up. Not the walls beating him up!

Ty is ok now, I have been giving him pain relievers and he is his normal self. Running around like a mad man, which is making me a nervous wreck!!!

Help me decide!!

I need a change, I do like the way I look now, but I need something different. I'm starting over in my life, so shouldn't my look be fresh? I want to cut my hair, but have no clue what to do with it! So I need your help!! I have had my hair short before, well just below my chin, and I liked it. Right now my hair is long, and it gets in the way!!

Ok so you have seen the short hair, and the long hair. Short was easy to handle and somewhat cuter to style.  I would however like something like this:

Or could I pull off something like this?

Ok so I need your help!!!! Please help me to decide what to do with my hair, I need a change, I'm not afraid to do something drastic but I still want it to look good!!!

Please leave comments and tell me your opinions!!!

Please excuse the pictures, the one with the short hair is the best I have!

Just a blog :)

Over the past 6 years, I have had some wonderful relationships. It all started in high school, with a boy who we will name "Clifford". Clifford was my first real boyfriend. One that parents met, one that they liked, one that we would take out to our family dinners. Clifford was very outgoing, loved to rock climb, hike, be adventureous. I liked that about him. I broke up with him. Reason being, his shoes. I was young, 17...and didn't know what I wanted in life. He had told me he loved me, but I just wasn't that into him. I wanted to be free. His shoes bugged me so much that I had to let him go. Clifford never knew that was the reason. Next came my first true love. We met while working at a retirement home together. He was the bad boy with all the piercings and tattoos, and I was the shy, tall good girl. We will call him "Marty". Marty was very sweet, it all happend rather fast. We went out on a few dates, and fell madly in love. It was something I had never felt before. My heart raced every time I saw him, my hands got sweaty when he hugged me, my face turned bright red. I was filled with joy everytime I was with him. I met some amazing people from him. Some of them I still keep in touch with, but don't hang out with unfortunately. He was my everything. We dated for almost three years. Two of those years were a dream, I thought he'd be the one I'd spend my life with. During our final year together, I found out he wasn't who I thought he was. Lies came out, and kept coming. Our relationship fell apart, and we no longer trusted each other. Marty was turning into someone who I couldn't stand, someone I no longer wanted to be with. We worked on things, and things got a lot better, I was feeling like maybe this will work. Out of the blue he broke up with me. I have never been so devestated in my life. I would be up crying all night, my mum would come and lay with me and hold me, tell me it would be ok. She was my saviour. Things got easier. I planned to be single for a long time, explore the world. Then I met another guy, someone smart, someone with his head in the right place, someone fun. We'll name this guy "Eddie". He took me out, treated me like a princess. I wanted to be with him. So much for living the single life. We started a relationship, bought a house, and had a child. Things took a turn for the worse, we won't go into details. I loved him, but I never felt the same feelings I did for my first true love, and neither did he. I want to feel those feelings again someday. Maybe I will. Maybe I won't. But I plan to be single and explore this new side of me. I can't let myself jump into a new relationship. Can I date? Sure, I plan to, and have met some wonderful guys. Am I looking for the one? Not right now. Right now I want to get to know who I am. Get to know the real me.

Mothers Day....

Mothers Day...just another Hallmark Holiday? Part of these days are just a way for card companies, flower companies, spa's and restaurants to make more money. It is true that flower sales go up around this time of year. Shouldn't we be buying our Mothers flowers every day of the year? Mothers do so much for us, cook, clean (they still will when you live on your own!) call us to check in, hold us when we are feeling down, and love us with all of their hearts. I know I take my mum for granted sometimes. She takes care of me so well, and she takes care of Ty too. I know I should show more appriciation for her. I think becoming a mom myself has made me realise all that she does for me. We celebrated Mothers Day for my mum a few weeks ago, as Mothers Day is on a different day in England. We bought her a few gifts, but do gifts really mean anything? It brought a smile to her face, but I want to bring that smile to her face every day with out buying a gift. I need to show her how much I care about her and how what she does for me means so much. I need to start pitching in more. Doing more laundry, cleaning the house more. She works, takes care of Ty while I work, and she has to take care of herself too. She has made my life as a single mom so much easier. While flowers and chocolates are nice, I think a hug and an I love you is nicer, those are things we should give our moms everyday.

Last year I celebrated my first mothers day. I was upset because I didn't even get a card! But thinking about it now, Ty was just a baby...how was he to know? And he shows me he loves me everyday with that smile that makes my heart melt. and makes everything that I do for him feel so right.